Every discipline has its share of jargon, and some of that is certainly necessary. But is it just me, or is education a little out of control? There are plenty of phrases that don’t make any sense outside of an education context (or occasionally, not even in one), and the use of acronyms is, in my opinion, egregious. (“Are you DIBELing today?”) And then there are just some words that drive you nuts. Therefore, I give you my (by no means exhaustive) list of words teachers never want to hear again.
“Rigor”
Look, I realize that it’s important for educational experiences to be intellectually challenging, but I think we’ve taken it a bit too far. (Don’t get me started on rigor in kindergarten.) And maybe I watch too many crime procedural shows, but this word just makes me think of dead bodies.
“Pivot”
I cannot hear “pivot” and not have Ross Geller from “Friends” echoing in my ears. And it’s extra painful because I know it means I’m going to have to throw out everything I did and start all over again.
“Self-care”
Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about teachers doing what they need to take care of themselves. I’m not a fan, however, of admin using the term flippantly. Like, don’t tell me to practice self-care in one breath and then deny my discretionary leave in the next.
“Friends”
I’m probably going to offend some people here, but I can’t get on board with calling my students “friends.” I’m sure you all have your own opinions around addressing students. In the great wide world of teachers, there are plenty of people who hate “kiddos, “scholars,” and “pupils.” So there.
“Fidelity”
It gets thrown around all the time and much to our collective chagrin, because nothing says “we don’t trust teachers” like the word “fidelity.” Look, I get that a research-based program won’t be as effective if we step too far away from its original design. But we also deserve to have our professionalism respected if we need to adapt to the needs of our students.
“Unpack”
Um, can my standards just come unpacked in the first place?
“Stakeholders”
Code for: people whose opinions matter more than teachers’.
“Monday”
For obvious reasons.
“Intentional”
Oh, I’m so glad you told me because I’ve been doing all this teaching accidentally.
“Robust”
Honestly, this one just gives me a fit of the giggles. I feel like it’s the educational equivalent of “moist.” I know it can mean anything from hardy and vigorous to strong and effective. In any case, I’m much more likely to use it to describe wine than a curriculum or approach.
“Pedagogy”
This term refers to the theory and practice of teaching. It’s the stuff of teachers’ daily lives. But dare I say it’s also a tad pretentious? Like, let’s just call it teaching, no?
“Data-driven”
Let’s take a “deeper dive” and “drill down” while we’re at it.
“Alignment”
Tell me I’m going to be putting sticky notes on a larger sheet of sticky notes without telling me I’m going to be putting sticky notes on a larger sheet of sticky notes.
“Granular”
This word makes me think of zits. I have no explanation.
“Initiative”
As in a new one. As in more on your plate without taking anything off.
“Transparent”
This word gives me a serious case of “I don’t believe you.”
“Cohort”
Dude, it’s just a group. Also “cluster” because I hear a swear at the end of it.
“Staffulty”
I know! Let’s take two words and make a non-word! Hanitizer, craftivity, and the granddaddy of them all: gymacafetorium.
“Table”
I’m going to put a pin in this or put it in the parking lot. That’s eduspeak for we’re never going to get to it.
“Stick-to-itiveness”
Of all the words I hate, it’s the words that aren’t words that I hate the most. Especially when there’s an actual existing word that means the same thing. “Tenacity,” anyone?
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